


The Comeback Kid

by ItheGodot



Category: Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Background Relationships, Brainwashing, Gen, Gen or Pre-Slash, Minor Violence, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Temporary Character Death, There's gonna be angst, Wally West is Alive, Wally West is Brainwashed, appearances by other characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-02
Updated: 2020-01-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:14:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22083958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ItheGodot/pseuds/ItheGodot
Summary: Wally West returns. Or does he? Can you call it a return if he does not even know his name?Oh, and there's a minor complication: he's not with the good guys this time.
Relationships: Dick Grayson & Artemis Crock, Dick Grayson & Wally West
Comments: 4
Kudos: 56





	1. Conception

**Author's Note:**

> My take on why Wally West isn't back yet - maybe he just can't be, because he's been stuck somewhere even worse than Speedforce. Let's see if we can get him to return.  
> This is probably the longest fic I ever (more or less) finished.  
> It is divided into chapters of varying length and importance (and you thought only animes had shameless filler episodes), though I kinda wanted all of them.  
> Also, there will be other YJ characters appearing, but I don't know if I should tag them since they are either only mentioned, or mostly episodic, and the story revolves around the main team of S1.  
> Slash is currently non-existent or very much not the point, I'll add tags if I see them going anywhere. But yeah, it was written with one particular relationship in mind, so I'm tagging it &.  
> I had fun with this, here's to hoping you guys will too. Feedback is always welcome. :)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vandal Savage asked Darkseid for weapons, he did not need an army of aliens.  
> Well, maybe this particular one he could use. Who knew Darkseid had brainwashed speedsters for sale.

Savage looked about and around the massive warehouse; hundreds upon thousands of dim crystal pods mounted on its infinite walls.

It even annoyed him a little, how dismissive Darkseid was about the vastness of his army – which he didn’t even put to proper use. What he, Savage, could do with a power like that..!

On the other hand, these were only mindless monsters and brainwashed boogies. An army of puppets was useful, but the time for it will come later. Right now he was in the market for heavy hitters, and Darkseid _insisted_ he should choose one from his ranks.

They entered yet another section of the facility, smaller and less crowded this time. There were larger cells here, and much less in number, and they did not hold an army of clones – each specimen was different here.

‘Granny had a habit of picking up strays and converting them to obey Darkseid,’ Dr Bedlam explained monotonously. Savage rolled his eyes. He did not look forward to having one of Darkseid’s puppets spying on him. But a deal was a deal.

He scanned one of the walls. If he had to pick a Darkseid’s lackey, at least it had to be someone useful.

‘You mentioned needing someone capable of handling discrete missions. I suggest looking at this one. Bedlam, tell him,’ Darkseid ordered. The doctor stepped closer and pointed at a purple-skinned alien in one of the pods.

‘Number 2817,’ he said. ‘An amphibian from Rann. A trained assassin, can operate in ambience, underwater, underground, even in space for a time. It also secretes potent venom from its nails.’

‘I’m not looking to murder half the planet,’ Savage commented.

Dr Bedlam shrugged, with the kind of _what else is there to do_ air about him _._

‘Number 1651,’ he pointed at another. ‘A Bgztlian. Can density-shift, walk through walls, obviously resourceful. Or here… Number 6658. A Euphorian. A powerful telepath and telekinetic. It has a bit of an attitude, though.’

Only a tiny twitch of his lips marked Savage’s frustration. A telepath loyal to Darkseid was the last thing he needed.

His look stopped on one of the cells and he scowled.

‘That one looks like a human from Earth.’

Bedlam squinted at him.

‘Quite observant. Yes, number 11514,’ he chimed. ‘Based on the DNA, it _is_ an Earthling. However, we do not know where it came from, Granny found it in an interdimensional void. It had no mind to begin with; of course, to be sure, we kept it in the ghost dimension for a time so there would not be any will left. Also completely devoted to Darkseid, and as long as you obey us, it will obey you.’

Savage pursed his lips but ignored the doctor’s remark. He was not well-known for obedience anyway, and Darkseid did not even expect it from him. They both knew they were only allies for as long as it was convenient; Savage’s advantage was, however, that Darkseid thought him and the Light completely insignificant beyond that, and did not keep too close an eye on their operations – so he had more than enough room to prepare for the time when they would, inevitably, cross each other again.

And the slave in the pod intrigued him. Based on his looks, he was a human - a young man, average-built on the skinnier side, dressed in a dark grey skin-tight suit and a cowl over his face, which left his red hair springing free, and a black insignia of a lightning bolt on his chest.

Very curious.

‘Anything special about him? Since you’re keeping him in your _special_ warehouse,’ Savage asked nonchalantly. Bedlam grinned wide.

‘Let me show you,’ he fiddled with the pod’s controls, and the crystal shield lifted, releasing a cloud of thick foggy gas.

The slave dropped from the cell to the floor, falling on one knee. When he opened his eyes, Savage saw they were dull and unfocused, grey like muddy water. He only stared before himself.

‘Darkseid is!’ Bedlam exclaimed.

‘Darkseid is,’ the slave repeated, rising on his feet. He looked unbalanced, like a whiff of wind could mow him down. Not much for strength, but if he was what Savage thought he might be…

‘Slave, here are the coordinates, distance one hundred miles,’ the scientist flashed a red screen before the slave’s eyes. ‘Go there and bring me a blue orb.’

‘Yes, master.’

Without a word, the slave vanished, leaving a trace of charge in the air.

Savage cocked an eyebrow.

In five seconds the slave was standing before them already, a blue orb in his hand. Bedlam’s attendant took it from him and gave it to Savage.

‘It moves at incredible speeds,’ the doctor explained. ‘Sound speed is not even a challenge. It is able to process information, make explosions when vibrating through surfaces, and has incredible strength when its velocity builds up. Not exactly intelligent, as I said, but it’s good at following orders. Good job, slave. Darkseid approves of your effort.’

‘Darkseid is,’ the slave bowed his head.

Savage turned the orb in his hand. So, _a Flash_. And, apparently, Darkseid’s people are not aware of speedster powers.

‘I’ll take him,’ he said, making sure to sound disinterested. ‘He looks like an Earthling; he will be easier to operate down there.’

Darkseid nodded, crossing his arms behind his back, and Bedlam snapped his fingers for his attendants to put restraints on him.

‘It will wait for you with the weapons. Now follow me,’ the Apokoliptan overlord commanded.

Only internally, Savage rolled his eyes again.


	2. Encounter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dick Grayson knows the world hates him. Why does the Light have to come out with their ploys every single time he has a night off?  
> But he just has to deal with Deathstroke, and then it's back to bed.  
> Boy is he in for a surprise.

This was supposed to be a no effort mission! He had his whole night planned out perfectly: get in, get the stuff, get out, get home, get some sleep. No one told him Deathstroke was going to show up! How did he even know?!

‘If Slade is here, and we _know_ he’s working with Luthor, we can’t let them have it,’ Oracle’s message flashed in his lenses.

‘Not planning to,’ he mumbled, taking a fighting stance. Jefferson did the same, tossing the container to Conner for safekeeping.

Slade was standing at the door, blocking their exit, his arms leisurely crossed on his chest.

‘Give me the device.’

‘You’re a little outnumbered to threaten,’ Dick snapped at him.

‘Oh, that’s temporary, as always.’

‘Less talking, creep!’ Conner snarled beside him. Dick elbowed him.

‘We’ll take Slade,’ he mumbled. ‘You protect the container. Oracle, are there any others on the premises?’

 _I pick up_ _nothing_ showed up on his feed. He pursed his lips.

‘I can do both with my hands tied,’ Conner hummed beside him.

‘Yea, no. Let us handle this.’

Slade rolled his eyes.

‘Do you really think I’d waste my time fighting you when I can have you taken out in a flash?’

‘One can dream,’ Jefferson growled. His fists crackled.

Slade only gave him a smirk.

‘BL, stay sharp,’ Dick mumbled. It was suspicious; Deathstroke was just standing there. True enough, _they_ needed to get through him to get out, but _he_ needed the container. Why wasn’t he advancing?

‘Nightwing, boy, I don’t have all night.’ Slade teased again, ‘I have a present for you, come get it.’

Dick exhaled. Well, they had to make a move sooner or later.

Without a word, both he and Black Lightning darted forward, Jefferson releasing a stream of lightning from his hands.

Slade did not even flinch as blue light approached his face.

 _‘Darkseid is,’_ he said, his voice laced with menace.

Everything after that was an explosion of chaos. Right before Black Lightning could hit Slade, a black blur swept in out of nowhere, clashed with the lightning stream and _redirected it_ – at Dick. The current hit him straight into the chest, and he screamed as a charge run down all his nerves. The blast sent him flying, he crashed into a wall, flopped on the ground and curled into a ball, clawing at his burning chest where the bolt connected.

He heard Superboy shout for him, but could not react properly, too occupied with all senses buzzing and muscles twitching violently.

‘Nightwing! Nightwing, answer me!’ Conner was by his side already, and his palm on Dick’s side somehow took away half the pain and helped ground him.

‘-kay,’ he moaned, ‘m okay. F… fine,’ he coughed out. Damn it, Jefferson did not pull his punches with Deathstroke.

Conner checked his breathing and pulse and, apparently satisfied, patted on his chest.

‘Okay then, stay put. And hold this,’ he pushed the container at him, and Dick’s arms curled around it like a sloth’s.

‘What the…’

‘That’s what I’d like to know,’ Conner stood up and stomped away, back to the battle.

Huffing and grumbling, still hugging the container, Dick turned on his side and opened one eye. There was another man now standing beside Deathstroke; Dick tried to make out who it was, but his sight was still hazy.

 _Zip_.

Slade’s new accomplice moved, but he could not even see it before he pummeled Jefferson into a wall.

_What now, the Light had a speedster?!_

Slowly, his insides turned cold.

The speedster was wearing a black skin-tight suit with a red bolt on his chest and red goggles on his face.

His cowl left the top of his head open, and he had red hair.

_Did he hit his head on that wall or something?_

‘You’d better have a fucking explanation, Slade!’ Conner growled.

‘You like my new sidekick, mm, Super _boy_?’ The hitman teased.

Dick felt his heartbeat pick up, and all the pain receded when adrenaline rushed in his veins.

_That red hair. Come on, not a good time for hallucinations at all._

‘We picked him up from Darkseid,’ Slade continued, placing his hand on the speedster’s shoulder. ‘Apparently, the great overlord’s servants found him in some void and made themselves a slave. He’s such a good little soldier. Completely mindless, will only do anything I say. Now… Kid, take down Superboy. The one with the red S on his chest. Then take that container, see?’

‘Bring it!’ Conner roared, charging to meet him, but the speedster vanished.

Dick felt a gust wind sweep behind him.

_He’s accelerating!_

‘SB-’

Before Dick had any time to call out, the speedster crashed into Superboy with the momentum of a bullet train behind his kick, and Conner moulded into a wall, probably still gaping in surprise.

The speedster stopped for a second, half-squatting and brushing his fingers on the floor to make a turn-

_That stance..!?_

He then dashed again – and Dick blinked, and realized that the container he had been holding was in Slade’s hands already. _No fucking way_!

He scrambled from the ground and set off after him, but the speedster zipped in front of him.

‘Come on, man,’ Dick complained. ‘Don’t do this…’ 

With the corner of his eye, Dick noticed Jefferson amass and release a ball of lightning-

‘No!’ He screamed, jumped on the speedster and pushed him out of harm’s way, ‘don’t hurt him!’

Momentarily, the speedster looked at him - but there was no recognition in his eyes. He struggled under his hold, and finally tossed Dick off himself with a quick kick and zipped away.

‘You out of your goddamn mind!?’ Black Lightning roared; the speedster was now attacking him with relentless ferocity, easily evading his bolts and driving him into a corner.

Dick got up and hurried to help him, but the speedster blocked him, punching him into a wall, then returned to fight Black Lightning and smashed him into the floor before any of them could react.

Jefferson stayed down this time.

The speedster swept back towards Dick.

‘Stop!’ Slade boomed, and he halted mid-punch. Dick backed away slowly, not taking his eyes off.

‘Good job, kid,’ the old assassin praised him with a self-satisfactory grin on his face. ‘That one with the blue symbol on his chest? That’s Nightwing. We’ll be seeing him again, I’m sure. Now, take him down and take off his belt; he might be hiding parts to this device in there.’

_Fuck._

‘See you around, Nightwing boy,’ Slade saluted him, still grinning, and left the room.

The speedster turned to him. Dick took a defensive stance, raising his fists.

‘Don’t do this,’ he whined quietly.

They used to be pretty evenly matched, he and KF, and on his best days he could’ve toppled him over without fail. He just had to close his eyes.

But his opponent’s speed was nothing like Wally’s used to be - and this wasn’t his best day, apparently. 

Dick blocked one punch and immediately counterattacked, but missed, and, instead of trusting his senses, opened his eyes to check around ( _Are you dumb?! Like some rookie!_ ), but was only met with a supersonic fist in his face.

He swivelled backwards on his heels to try and keep his balance, but the speedster did not give him a chance. Riding on the momentum, he drove his fist right into Dick’s solar plexus, and he heaved, doubling down; not wasting any time, the speedster clocked him on the back of his head, and Dick sagged to the ground.

Time turned into a fuzzy mash; in what felt like hours, he realized the speedster was fumbling with his utility belt.

_No no no_

His belt clicked free, and the speedster tore it off, and stood up, stepping over Dick.

_This couldn’t just be it, could it?_

‘Wait!’ Dick moaned at the speedster’s back, scrambling on his hands, only to drop face down on the floor again. He raised his head again, ‘wait, stop!’

The speedster halted, the air crackling around him.

His whole stature, shape, the way he was walking… 

‘Is it really you..?’ Dick asked softly, rising on his arms and reaching for him. The speedster turned his head.

Even with the mask and goggles, his face was recognizable. Or maybe it was just him, but those lips, nose, and those freckles, and that expression of contempt mixed with curiosity - Dick knew it all so well, burned into the back of his mind, the face of his best friend, there could have been no mistaking it-

He blasted off and disappeared.

Dick once again sagged, his jaw locked so hard it hurt.

  
  


After a short minute, he found he was being raised from the ground.

‘You okay?’ Conner asked, helping him sit up. There was a major bruise all over the left side of his face. _Impressive._

Dick shrugged. ‘BL?’ He called.

There was a long pause, and they both tensed… 

‘From the way it hurts, I’m still alive,’ Jefferson groaned. Dick huffed. Conner helped him stand up and half-carried him towards Jeff, where they both dropped on the ground and helped him sit up.

‘I think the bastard broke all the bones I have,’ Jefferson complained, hugging his stomach.

‘No, just the ribs,’ Conner commented impassively.

Dick’s mind was barely there, and Conner followed his look into the distance.

‘He packs quite a punch,’ he stated.

‘Does he now,’ Dick snorted. It’s a miracle _his_ ribs weren’t broken. And the way he just slammed Superboy into that wall with a supersonic kick? Kid Flash had never been that strong.

‘Another Cadmus experiment?’ Conner muttered under his breath. Dick shook his head. After Roy, they had been especially thorough. Cadmus was under the League’s surveillance, Batman ensured them _he_ was in control, and Luthor was removed. There were no more experiments. There couldn’t have been. ‘Can something else make clones then? Slade mentioned Darkseid…’

Dick had no answer. His heart was in his throat either way.

‘What if…’ He mumbled and looked at Conner, somehow too scared to finish the sentence.

Conner shrugged.

‘Let’s go tell the League.’


	3. Doubt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Light has a speedster who looks like Wally. Dick understands that's a lot to unpack for the Team, but how long can they wait before they set out to the rescue?  
> Longer than he anticipated, apparently.

His conscience returned slowly, like a free-diver rising from a dark abyss.

Lazily he picked up his senses. A soft bed under him; quiet, just the hum of the air conditioner. And there was a hint of medicines in the smell.

So, a ward. What the hell happened?

He groaned and opened his eyes.

Kaldur was sitting next to his bed. He put away his tablet and smiled, placing his hand on Dick’s arm.

‘Welcome back, my friend,’ he said in the ever-soothing voice of his. Dick relaxed.

‘Hi there. What’s going on?’

‘Conner brought you in unconscious. You had a minor concussion, and a few bad bruises, but Dr Hoshi said you will sleep it off. How are you feeling?’

‘Fine, I’m fine. Give me a couple of minutes to get my brain on.’

‘Of course.’

A concussion. When did that happen? And Conner brought him in? Why Con-

His eyes darted to Kaldur wide with shock, and he sprang up in the bed.

The Atlantean immediately rose from his seat and relocated on the bedside, putting his arm on Dick’s shoulder.

‘It’s okay,’ he said. ‘Conner told me everything. You need to stay in bed.’

Dick huffed lightly, relaxing a little and dropping back on the pillow. ‘I’ll try,’ he gave a tired smirk. ‘So, Conner told you? How long was I out? Have you started tracking Deathstroke already?’

Kaldur pursed his lips. ‘You slept for five hours. Not yet.’

‘Why!? We need to find him! Slade has _him!_ ’

‘Dick, please calm down.’

‘I’m calm. But we have to rescue him. He’s alive, Kaldur, it was him!’

‘No, we don’t know that,’ M’gann appeared in the doorway and gave him a worried smile; she was followed by Conner. Dick looked at him with no small amount of hope, but he only shrugged. ‘We don’t know if it was Wally.’

Dick exhaled. He _hadn’t dared_ say _his_ name, too scared it would turn into a dream if spoken too loud.

M’gann came inside the ward and sat down on the other side of his bed. She clasped her hands together. Kaldur still had his palm on Dick’s forearm. Conner went to the window and rested against the sill, crossing his arms on his chest.

_Oh damn, he knew where this was going._

‘You don’t believe me,’ he muttered.

‘Well, it happened in the past,’ M’gann said carefully.

‘What?!’

‘You… seeing Wally. When he wasn’t there.’

Dick opened his mouth to argue but closed it again. She was not wrong. But all those other times it was different, it was-

‘I did _not_ hallucinate!’ Dick yelled. ‘ _Conner_ was the one who told you!’

‘He told us Deathstroke had a speedster,’ M’gann said patiently. ‘Who attacked you and who showed no recognition of you. And even if he looked like Wally, it could be any number of things. A clone. A shapeshifter. A magic trick.’

‘Who cares? Who the hell cares?! If there’s one-thousandth of a chance that it _might_ actually be him, we need to take it!’

Kaldur lowered his eyes. ‘There is a danger to it. We need to tread carefully.’

‘What are you talking about?!’

‘That speedster _single-handedly_ took down _Superboy, Black Lightning_ and _you_ ,’ Kaldur explained. ‘That is not the kind of power Wally ever possessed. If anything, it is a cause for concern.’

‘Dick, think about it,’ M’gann took his hand now. ‘It’s been three years. Why now?’

‘Slade said he picked him up from Darkseid. What if he was there all this time?! Trapped, imprisoned-’

‘Then why was he freed _now_? _If_ he was freed. And Deathstroke has him… Which means it might be something Luthor created to throw us off.’

Dick harrumphed, but had to nod. _It was working_.

‘We’re not saying we’re leaving this alone,’ Kaldur added. ‘We _will_ uncover the truth. I just want to ask you… not to do anything rash,’ he pleaded.

He sank into the pillow and closed his eyes.

‘How’s Jefferson?’ He asked wearily to change the topic.

‘Healing. Had a few ribs broken, we will keep him out of missions for a while.’

‘That’s great,’ he mumbled. At least it wasn’t anything worse.

His mind raced back to the encounter. Rationally, he knew Kaldur and M’gann were right. A minute ago he was ready to jump from the bed and run all over the country to find Slade himself, but they were right. What were the chances..? The speedster could only be another hallucination.

He knew. He knew all that.

_He’s gone. You know he’s gone._

He covered his face with his palms.

 _Let it go_.

‘Dick!’

His head snapped to the entrance of the ward. Artemis was standing at the door in her civilian clothes, both her arms set against the frame, her hair a little rustled and panic in her eyes. She hurried up to his bedside and set her fists on the mattress.

‘I spoke to Barbara, she said…’

Her voice was high-pitched. Dick shook his head in dismay.

‘I don’t know, Arty. I don’t know what to tell you.’

‘What do you mean, you don't know? Do you mean… it’s _not impossible_?’

Her look darted from him to Kaldur, to M’gann, to Conner.

Conner shrugged, staring out the window. He looked unusually tense, even for him. ‘It’s not impossible,’ he said blankly.

Her face lit up with both hope and terror. She stared back at Dick.

He immediately raised up his arms and she swayed into his hold. He glanced at Kaldur, who cast down his eyes.

‘It’s too early to hope,’ their leader said.

‘Some of us never stopped,’ Artemis mumbled into Dick’s chest, hugging him tighter. Dick smiled weakly.

He could only kindle it. He had been so _sure_ before _,_ but the longer he thought about that fight, the less he was convinced. In his mind he was nitpicking every little sequence from their face-off, pointing out each little detail which was out of place, and his mind was good at it. Kaldur was right; there was still too much they stood to lose.

‘How’s your head, Boy Blunder?’ Artemis finally released him, sat up and fixed her hair with her hands. ‘Babs said you pulled the usual.’

‘Oh, you know. I have a thick skull.’

‘The thickest,’ she smirked, knocking on his brow; he grimaced. ‘Why don’t you guys tell me exactly what happened, and I’ll tell you if you’re completely out of your mind?’

Typical Artemis. She tried to sound nonchalant, but there was an undertone in her voice, a tiny quiver which showed just how strung up she was. Well, he supposed, that was only natural. Whatever it was, really, it was going to leave them all in turmoil. It’s been three years and they had all come to terms with the loss, they moved on, as best they could. _Why now,_ M’gann said.

‘I will have to leave you to it, my friends,’ Kaldur stood up. ‘Batman requested an update on this situation. M’gann, can I have a word?’

She smiled at both Dick and Artemis, nodded to them and followed Kaldur out of the ward.

***

‘What do you think?’ Kaldur asked her as they slowly made their way across the corridors back to the central hub. M’gann’s look was lost before her, her arms glued to her sides.

She shook her head a little to chase away her thoughts.

‘Do you mean, whether I think it’s possible?’ She asked. Kaldur nodded. ‘We’ve seen _more_ impossible things, haven’t we?’

Kaldur gave her a small smile.

‘But I will have to touch his mind before we can be sure.’

‘Of course. We _will be_ careful. Luthor knows us well enough to play our strings, we must be vigilant… No matter how much we wish it.’

M’gann nodded.


	4. Faith

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something triggers the alarms Batman set up in the ruin of Mount Justice. Dick decides to go and check it out.

‘Huh.’

The way she said it filled the air with tension.

‘Huh?’ Dick rose on one elbow. He was lying on Barbara’s couch, his legs dangling over the backrest, scanning lazily through Reddit feed on his phone. Dr Hoshi told him to have a night off, come on.

Somehow now, after they sat down and talked about how it wasn’t working, and decided to ‘stay friends’, he was hanging out at her place more often than he did when they were in a relationship. Figures.

Barbara was furiously clicking through numerous video feeds, she was clearly looking for something.

‘What is it?’

‘Probably nothing.’

‘ _Nothing_ does not usually invoke that sort of _huh_ from you.’

She finished scrolling through the screens and put them all into tiny squares on her monitor.

‘Something ticked off an alarm we set up at the Cave. But I can’t seem to find anyone inside.’

‘Maybe the alarm scared them off.’

‘It was a _silent_ alarm.’

Oh, yeah, they had those, too.

‘Malfunction?’

‘Maybe? There does not seem to be anything else wro-’

The screen of her phone lit up again with a red alert marker. She scowled, glaring at the video feeds again. Dick rose from the couch, walked to her desk and rested on the back of her chair.

‘Breached again?’

‘So it says.’

Dick too stared at the monitors, but the video feeds seemed inconspicuous.

‘Motion sensors?’

‘Nada.’

They exchanged looks.

‘I’ll go check it out,’ Dick grumbled.

‘No, wait. There’s no need. Dr Hoshi told you to rest and it’s probably just some stupid kids looking for a spooky adventure in an abandoned cave.’

‘Stupid kids would show up on CCTV.’

Barbara gave him a small smile. ‘Fine. When have you ever listened to me.’

Dick only winked at her and slunk away to the hallway to pick up his jacket. One of Batgirl’s hideouts was just around the block, and he still kept a spare Nightwing suit there.

There goes the night off.

  
  


Getting into the ruin of Mount Justice after he disabled all of the alarms was a piece of cake.

‘Do you see me on cameras?’ He asked Oracle.

‘ _Yes._ ’ Her reply showed up in his lenses.

‘So it’s not a malfunction.’

‘ _Apparently not._ ’

‘Okay, I’m going in.’

‘ _Be careful._ ’

Dick did not reply. He slowly made his way through the stuffy corridors. They were pitch black, but he would not even need his night-vision mask to know where he was going. He knew them all like the back of his hand.

His steps were inaudible over the blanket of dust that covered the floor over the years of abandonment.

They never restored the Cave.

‘ _I picked you up on motion sensors, so they’re working alright,_ ’ Oracle typed again. Dick hummed.

He reached a clearing that was once the main hub of the Cave; as expected, it was empty and silent, only piles of shadowy debris looming around by the lumpy rock walls, and smashed consoles sitting reproachfully in the middle.

‘What about the remaining vents?’

‘ _They’re netted with motion sensors too, you should know that, Mr Original Roster._ ’

It should’ve been a small joke, but standing in the middle of the destroyed Cave, it stung instead.

‘Would they still be working?’

‘ _B said he renewed the circuits some time ago, just in case._ ’

‘Then on I go.’

He felt like entering a tomb. In many ways it was; a grave for their childhood ideals, adventures and simpler times. The silence weighed him down with the whole grandeur of the mountain.

‘I’ll check the back hallways and head to the slope,’ he told her and submerged again into the darkness.

He tried to stay alert, but there was just too much silence, dust and old memories seeping from behind every corner.

This was the corridor where Red Volcano and Red Inferno cornered him and Artemis when the Cave was attacked on their very first year.

That right there was where they chased Impulse when he had just come from the future (how weird is that..?).

Didn’t he and Zatanna make out in that… yeah, that wreck used to be a storage room. Oh, what days it was.

And there on the left, the damned souvenir storage. A tomb within a tomb, a charred memorial to so much more than just their adventures.

To him, this place had been Wally’s real grave. Not the hologram at the Watchtower, not the stone slab in Keystone Cemetery… Here. His aspirations and his stories, all burnt to a crisp, vanished without a trace, just like the man himself. It was rare now, but during the first year, on those darkest days when missing his best friend got unbearable, Dick would come here for a little while, just to think, or sometimes try to dig up or recreate the less-damaged souvenirs and put them back on the shelf.

Even now, faced with a spark of hope that _maybe_ … 

He tried to avoid looking in, but couldn’t, and his blood ran cold.

There was someone inside.

  
  


His feet took root in the floor.

It was Slade’s speedster. The one M’gann said he might have hallucinated.

When wasn’t Barbara talking to him?! Shit, was he hallucinating now?

The man in the black suit was barely visible in the dark, but Dick could see him move slowly, as if too trying to preserve the sanctity of the little shrine. He ran his palm over one of the shelves, then rubbed the dust between his fingers. He picked some trifle up and turned it in his hand, then put it back, and for a while just stood there, staring into the darkness.

He wasn’t wearing his cowl now, and his whole posture looked so familiar it made Dick ache inside.

It could not be _anything else_ but him!

He must’ve twitched, or breathed too loud, because the speedster turned, and the next thing he knew was his back against the wall, and a shaking hand clawed into his throat.

‘Wait!’ Dick choked hurriedly, ‘wait. I mean no harm. I’ll leave if you want. Please…’

The hand on his neck spasmed, but in the end, the speedster released him and stepped back.

Dick breathed easier, resting against the wall.

‘Do you know this place?’ He asked, trying to get his breathing in order. ‘Do you know where you are?’

A tiny shake of the head.

Dick sighed. ‘Then how did you find it? This place is secret, and also wired with alarms. How did you know how to enter it?’

A tiny shrug. The speedster looked up, and Dick finally saw his eyes - but they weren’t Wally’s eyes. Everything else checked out, but his eyes were grey, and washed out, and lifeless.

And there was still no recognition in them.

But it did not mean he could not try bringing that life back.

‘Listen to me. Even if you don’t really remember, you _know_ this is _your_ place. It's why you came, It was like home to you. To us. This is our Cave, Wally. This is who you are.’

Nothing.

‘Come with me. Let me help you… We’ll help you remember everything. You can trust me.’

He reached his hand up.

For a moment it looked like he might take it. Like he, Dick, might get through to him. Wally’s eyes were empty, but his face… there was fear on it, and confusion, and maybe, some strange curiosity-

But the next second he was already gone in a cloud of dust.

Dick exhaled. His ankles turned into jelly and he sagged on the floor.

He had not noticed before, how cold the Cave had been, but now he clearly felt there was a kind of heat left behind by the speedster, an aura that lingered in the air and made his heart beat faster.

***

‘Dick, Dick, are you okay?! Wake up, Dick, are you hurt!?’

He blinked slowly and sat up, helped up by Conner. M’gann put her palm on his brow.

‘Let’s get you to a doctor. Barbara called us all panicked, she said you went into the Cave and then all communications were cut… What happened?’

Dick ran a palm over his face.

What happened… 

‘I got him,’ he mumbled.

‘What are you talking about?’

‘Wally. Wally was here. CK, M’gann, it really _was_ Wally. How else would he have known how to find the Cave? He was real, he set off the alarms, he was really here.’

‘Dick…’

‘I got him. I put a tracker on him,’ he gave them a self-satisfied grin.


	5. Afternoon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Conner has doubts about whether the Light's speedster could really be Wally. Back at Happy Harbor, he's given an opportunity to test his suspicions.

_Zip._

There it was again. Conner tensed. Something was moving at the very edges of what his enhanced senses could pick up.

When it stilled, his ears registered a heartbeat.

An extremely rapid heartbeat.

Trying to appear oblivious, he continued working on his motorcycle, but half his attention was now perpetually focused on the treeline behind the corner of the house.

He was there. The speedster. _Wally_.

Frankly, he was still undecided if he really believed it. Dick was adamant, but that was only expected. Everyone else were either cautious or sceptical or, like Artemis, too terrified to believe. Batman ordered them to steer clear for now, but would that really stop them if they set their minds to it?

Conner knew Dick was preparing for an extraction, but was that even needed if the speedster could roam free and was coming to them himself? He had been at the Cave, there was no doubt about it, even if he shook off Dick's tracker the next day. And now? Something was drawing him to Happy Harbor. It might’ve been a hint of long lost memories…

Or it might’ve been programming, the clone possibility wasn’t ruled out yet. Even if it wasn’t Cadmus, the fact that Deathstroke and Luthor were the ones controlling him already was a red flag.

Conner would not mind it either; if anything, he would know exactly how to help a clone.

_Okay, time for a test run._

He unhooked the generator locks, took out the batteries and put them carefully on his desk. They needed cleaning anyway. One by one he removed the acid-filled cylinders from the locks and lined them on the desktop and turned back to the cycle. Just a careless bump with his leg…

Two of the cells started rolling along the desktop towards the edge. Conner tensed, half expecting he might have to jump and catch them before the containers hit the ground and spill, but then they went over the edge, and _zip-_

There he was, squatting low next to the desk, the two containers in his hands.

Conner lowered his posture to appear as unthreatening as possible.

‘Nice catch,’ he stretched his palm. ‘It would’ve been a mess if they broke.’

The speedster rose slowly and put the batteries into his hand. Conner could not take eyes off his face; he was still wearing the black suit, but this time he had the cowl and goggles off, and in broad daylight, there could have been no mistaking it.

Except for the eyes; Wally’s eyes had been green, almost unnaturally so – but this speedster’s irises were pale grey, almost invisible in the whites.

And he quickly cast his look down-

‘Wanna see what I’m working on?’ Conner asked before he would vanish. The speedster said nothing but did not scurry away, so Conner took it as a yes. He pointed at the top of one of the cylinders. ‘See, here’s acid battery cells, they boost the power of my motorcycle, but they’re pretty darn old, so they sometimes leak. I should replace them, but for now, cleaning the contacts will do. Pass me that rag?’

The speedster looked around on the desktop, took a white cloth and gave it to him. Conner started cleaning the cells. He worked in silence, and all the while, the speedster stood still beside him and watched.

 _Wally could never keep still this long_ , Conner smirked privately. He caught himself reminiscing. Wally used to be probably the only one who had any interest in the mechanics behind Sphere or even regular motorcycles. It hadn’t been oft, but over the years they still spent numerous hours in the garage together, fiddling with engines, disassembling machines and trying to upgrade them.

This today almost felt like the old days. 

And Wolf was sleeping in the sun just a yard away, completely unfazed by the speedster’s presence. There was no way of arguing with that kind of proof.

‘Pass me the number 10?’ Conner asked, but when the wrench did not land into his palm, he had to look up.

The speedster was frozen mid-motion, his look fixed on the house.

Conner exhaled. Fuck, he had been so lost in thought, he hadn’t even noticed.

M’gann was standing on the porch with her hand raised and her eyes glowing.

‘No, no!’ Conner moaned and jumped from his spot, but it was too late; as soon as M’gann let go of the speedster’s mind, he blasted off, the wrench dropping on the desktop with a twang.

Conner ran up to her; she had her palms clasped over her mouth.

‘I’m sorry,’ she mumbled, shaking her head, ‘I’m sorry…’

‘What did you do?’ Conner gripped her by the shoulders.

‘I saw him… I saw him, and I had to, had to… I had to see if it’s really..!’ She mumbled through her fingers. Her eyes were wet.

‘What did you see?’ Conner asked softly, running his hands down her arms.

M’gann shook her head again.

‘A void,’ she whispered, her shoulders sunken. ‘Just a black, _black_ abyss… There was nothing _Wally_ in there.’

She burst into tears, and Conner embraced her, shutting his own eyes tight.


	6. Mission Briefing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another mission goes awry, and Dick is furious. The Light is ahead of them at every turn, they can't postpone dealing with the speedster matter any longer. Will he be able to convince the Team to save Wally?

‘What happened?!’ Dick stormed into the command room. ‘First I hear you sent someone on a mission against Deathstroke without my knowing, and now Bart and Garfield are out?!’

‘We needed a quick response,’ Batman replied sternly. Aquaman was standing behind his chair with his arms crossed on his chest; Tim and M’gann were also nearby.

‘How long does it take to call me?!’

‘They are not obliged to report to you.’

‘No! But I specifically told you to let me know if you hear about Deathstroke, and you know _why_!’

‘You need to calm down, I authorized it.’

Dick slammed his palm on the Batcomputer console. He was silent for a few seconds, just glaring at him furiously.

‘ _Of course_ you did,’ finally he spoke, ‘and now two of our best Outsiders are down. Way to plan ahead, B.’

‘And _you_ would’ve made _all_ the difference!’ M’gann yelled, and he backed down a little. She was distressed, what with her brother in a coma, but every time they were faced with her rage, she made them all nervous anyway.

Dick sighed and crossed his arms on his chest.

‘I have my experience with Deathstroke, more times than anyone here combined, I know what we’re up against. That could’ve come in handy.’

A few long moments of everyone silently blaming themselves.

‘So will someone explain to me what happened?’

‘It was the speedster,’ now Tim cut in. ‘We weren’t ready for him… Bart wasn't ready for him.’ Dick nodded; remembering his first time, he could relate. ‘We were supposed to take a copy of the code for running the device that Luthor is after, and then destroy it. We managed to and were preparing to get out when he showed up. Miss M told us we might encounter him, and what he’d look like, and that we have to treat him like an enemy…’ Dick’s eyes snapped shortly to M’gann; she withheld his look, ‘but I guess it’s different face to face than when you just hear about it. Bart tried to go after him, but could not keep up and the speedster took him out. Then Deathstroke showed up and we… He attacked Beast Boy and we did not make it in time to help him.’

‘How are they?’

‘Bart is still unconscious, but he will be okay. Garfield’s critical, Deathstroke did him bad.’

Dick clicked his tongue.

‘So we are down three men already, and Luthor has the device _and_ the code. _Now_ will you listen to me and let me proceed with the extraction?’

‘ _That’s_ your take?!’

‘Yes, that! He’s _not_ the enemy! He’s just _with_ the enemy because he’s confused and he has no idea what he’s doing, and the longer we wait, the less are the chances we can save him. And if that doesn’t work for you, why not just be practical? If the Light don’t have him, they can’t use him!’

‘And what if we can’t hold him? What if he’s only waiting for us to take him in?’

‘Ugh, leave that to me! Why don’t we worry about that once we have him?’

‘I can’t leave it to you, you are too personally involved in this,’ Batman shut him down.

Dick bristled again, but it was Kaldur who came to his side now, landing his steady hand on his shoulder.

‘Can I make a proposal?’ He spoke calmly

The Dark Knight squinted at him but nodded.

‘Batman, do you trust my judgment as the League’s leader?’

He harrumphed.

‘I assume that’s as good as I am going to get,’ Aquaman smirked. ‘Can you trust me to resolve this matter? I promise we will not let the third component fall into the Light’s hands. But can you leave the speedster to us?’

Batman gave him a long critical look.

‘Very well,’ he conceded. Kaldur turned to Tim.

‘Robin, can you make sure Batman Incorporated stays out of missions related to Deathstroke and the speedster until further notice?’

‘Yes, sir,’ Tim replied solemnly, but Dick could see him trying to keep a face, probably not to laugh at the jab of his team’s name.

‘Thank you. We’ll leave you to your work. M’gann, Dick, please come with me.’

They followed Kaldur out of the command chamber and down onto the base level to the zeta tubes. All the while, their leader kept silent, and the tension between him and M’gann was suffocating too.

  
  


When they teleported to the Outsiders’ headquarters, Dick saw Conner, Artemis, Zatanna, and even Rachel and Will already waiting for them in the common room.

Dick and M’gann joined them, and Kaldur took his spot before the windows in front of them. He crossed his arms behind his back.

The sun was high in the sky, its beams glinting on his armour - but his eyebrows were furrowed, and his face bore a shadow.

‘I summoned all of you because this is our responsibility,’ he said sternly. ‘Some of you are currently in the League, and some have already left the hero life… But we were on the Team once, and this is a matter for all of us.’

‘Of course, Kaldur’ahm,’ Zatanna reassured. ‘We know.’

‘We already allowed the Light to take two of the three components they need for their plan,’ he continued. ‘I cannot speak freely of it, but please know that we have to stop them. Their next target is kept at Star Labs Atlanta. It must not fall into the Light’s hands, no matter what.’

He turned to the window.

‘The reason for our recent incompetence… Was that the Light has found a very efficient weapon against us. They used someone who used to be our own, someone we’ve missed dearly… So we could not fight him at full capacity. You already know this – the Light has an incredibly strong speedster who looks like Wally.’

There were no gasps or shocked looks; Kaldur was right, the rumours had already spread even to those who were not heroing anymore.

‘However, we have not been able to confirm that it really is him,’ their leader concluded.

‘What?!’ Dick hissed. ‘Kaldur, we just-’

‘Please let me finish. I know we are all disturbed. We all have our doubts, guesses, or evidence, or conviction. But I want you all to consider the possibility that we are being played, and what is at stake.

‘I promised Batman that we will stop the Light from obtaining the last piece, or we might risk another catastrophe. I want us to remember that saving the world was what Wally sacrificed his life for. In his memory, we cannot fail.’

 _Stab_.

Dick exhaled quietly. _But if they come through with this, he might not be just a memory!_

He raised his hand. Kaldur looked at him from under his brow.

‘I know what you are going to say. But the mission goes first.’

He dropped his head exasperatedly, and opened his mouth to argue, but, to his surprise, it was Will who raised his palm too.

‘Isn’t it the same mission?’ He asked casually. ‘I know you just said you haven’t confirmed it’s him, but we can’t really do that before he’s back with us, can we? We can stop the Light _and_ take him with us.’

‘It is very risky. We don't know if that isn't exactly what Light wants us to do, to get another mole into our ranks.’

'Oh, I know a thing or two about _moles_ ,' Will snapped, making even Kaldur turn his look. 'Does not automatically make him _not Wally_.'

'He has no memory of us, or of himself. Can he be the same person?'

‘What about muscle memory?’ Now Dick cut in. ‘We’ve seen enough footage and I’ve seen him myself. We spent years training together, we all know his moves! You know how he always used to lean to the right just before running off?’

Or the way he braked with his heels, always twisting the left one to the side in case he needed to change direction mid-brake. The way he often left his sides open if he was unfocused. Even if all of his kicks and punches were much stronger, the way he fought – his every move familiar to the bone, even after three years, Dick still remembered it by heart.

‘He used to do that alright,’ Artemis drawled. Dick saw it in her eyes; the hope was too painful, but it was there.

‘See?’ He turned again to Kaldur. ‘That’s your evidence.’

Kaldur came closer and gripped his shoulder. ‘I'm sorry, Dick... But now it sounds like you're just grasping at straws. Just willing does not make it true. He’s gone.’

‘We don’t know that!’ Dick hissed through gritted teeth. ‘What if, what if Slade was telling the truth?! We don’t know what happened when his body vanished. What if he _didn’t die_?! Just was transported somewhere, what if Darkseid really found him? Can you imagine what they put him through to make him into their slave?! If he was picked up by Granny, how many hours of torture in the ghost dimension do you think he had to endure?!’

Kaldur frowned. Just a few of them experienced the true power of the ghost dimension, and still, it had only been a glimpse. What if someone had to spend days, weeks, _years_ there? What if that someone was their friend?

He sighed, closing his eyes. ‘What if it _can’t_ be reversed?’

‘Why don’t we at least _try_?!’

‘Oh, will you just stop!?’ M’gann screamed. ‘He’s an enemy! He put Garfield in a coma!’

‘No, he did _not_!’ Dick snarled at her. ‘A, it was Deathstroke, b, he wouldn’t’ve done _anything at all_ if we had recovered him already!’

‘Dick! There’s no _recovering_ him, he’s _not_ Wally!’ She dismayed, throwing her arms up in the air. ‘I touched his mind. I couldn’t pick up any sense of self, anything, I’ve never even seen such an empty mind. He might as well be an android, he’s not _real_ , no matter how much we all want him to be!’

‘But at the Cave! He remembered the Cave! And Conner, you met him too. And you said Wolf…’ He sank his hands into his hair. Why wouldn’t they understand, why wouldn’t they at least _try_! ‘Come on, you guys-’

He met Kaldur’s look. Aquaman sighed quietly and closed his eyes.

Then he straightened up and put his arms behind his back again.

‘Our first priority is to protect the microchip that the Light is after,’ he spoke in his all-business voice. ‘We cannot let them have the last piece. If it comes to fighting, we will consider the speedster an enemy. This is final.’

Dick bristled, his fists shaking with tension.

He _knew_ , he knew Kaldur was right. They were already backed into a corner with no room for mistakes. And the speedster could only be a shell, a too-powerful, too-unpredictable shell. And even if he was who they wanted him to be – he was but a puppet controlled by the Light and sent to deal with Darkseid’s enemies.

Rationally, he was too dangerous.

_Even so, even so…_

‘Dick,’ Kaldur spoke carefully, ‘And Will too, and you, Artemis… I need you to give me your word. Your expertise would be indispensable, but I can only allow you on this mission if I can trust you to comply with the objective and my command. I know how much it will take from you… But can you promise me that? Can you still follow me?’

Dick looked up at his leader. There was grief in Kaldur’s eyes as he asked it, probably torn as much as anyone, but he remained firm.

His shoulders sank, but he nodded.

‘Always. You have my word.’

‘Yeah, no argument here,’ Will added. Artemis had her arms crossed on her chest but nodded too.

Kaldur bowed his head to each of them, giving his team a rueful smile.

‘Then it is time to go. Mission briefing onboard the Javelin, ETD in fifteen.’

Dick immediately spun on his heel and stormed out of the common room.

He wanted to punch something.

  
***

Artemis caught up with him halfway through the corridor and gripped his arm. She was already wearing her Tigress gear, save for the mask, and her hair was pulled into a pony-tail this time.

Dick wanted to smack her hand off, but caught her look and stopped.

He sighed, relaxed, and rested against the wall, taking her hand. Artemis joined him.

For a short while, they just stood there staring at the wall in front of them. They didn’t speak at all; to anyone observing, they could’ve appeared like having a telepathic conversation or something.

Instead, they were just holding each other’s hands, drawing from whatever strength they had left. 

Finally, Artemis squeezed his fingers.

‘What Kaldur said…’ She mumbled, ‘he’s right, you know. Wally did… what he did… gave his life to save the world. If we can’t protect it, if we fuck this up, he will never shut up about it once we meet him in the afterlife.’

Dick huffed lightly. Artemis bumped their shoulders together.

‘And if the world hasn’t ended, we’ll have more chances to get him back.’

He nodded and smiled. At least _someone_ was on his side…

‘Do you still believe it? That it’s him? M’gann, she saw his mind, it’s a pretty convincing argument…’ She whispered, gazing gloomily at their hands.

Now it was Dick’s turn to squeeze her palm.

‘Like you said. I’m hopeless at giving up hope.’

She chuckled. ‘Let’s go collect the next chance, then.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of my favourite YJ relationships has always been Artemis & Dick's friendship, and this ending pays a little homage to it.
> 
> For me, their bond was forged by years of well-earned trust and camaraderie and then hardened by a mutual loss. You can't tell me they didn't try to be there for each other - as best they could at the time, knowing intimately what the other was going through. And came out in the end with the dynamic we saw in S3, comfortable with making fun of each other (come on, "Says the girl named Tigress. Rrrrar!", gold), but also finding support in each other without words.
> 
> I feel like Artemis trusts him without question and also knows a side of him he would never reveal to anyone else, and Dick would fight tooth and nail for her, and also take her on any mission he can because he knows they are unstoppable together.
> 
> (So basically I love them and wanted to scream that. I'll shut up now.)


	7. Faith Rewarded

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They face off against the Light at Star Labs Atlanta. The mission does not go as planned, but when have they ever? There are bad guys, and explosions, and chaos... At least the speedster shows his true colours.

When they landed at Star Labs Atlanta, it was close to midday, and the campus was swarming with people. They should probably start with an evacuation, Dick thought, who knew how the Light would strike.

‘Villains these days, can’t even wait until decent night-time to make their moves,’ Will complained.

They quickly dispersed, each with their own mission that Kaldur had given. Dick was charged with tracking Deathstroke and keeping him away if he shows. But until then he had nothing much to do, so he just patrolled along the edge of the rooftop of one of the lab buildings.

The laboratory had two main blocks, A and B, on different ends of the campus, connected by a long greenhouse corridor, and a small park surrounding them. As far as Dick knew, the microchip the Light was after was kept in a vault in the lower levels of Block B, that was where Kaldur went, and he also positioned Conner and him at B. M’gann’s task was to telepathically scan the whole area for any irregularities, she was hovering high in the air above the campus. Everyone else were on the perimeter until, and if, it came to a fight.

The air was hot and humid and his suit was sticking to his skin, but all that he could effectively ignore, instead focused on looking for any movement.

A very specific type of movement, if he were honest.

_‘Head’s up,’_ Conner said over the mind link. 

Of course he’d be the first to hear something.

A high-speed vessel swept through the sky above their heads, releasing a swarm of black-clad paratroopers.

_‘They’re coming down on Block A. Red Arrow, Tigress, you’re up! Everyone else, keep your positions!’_ M’gann commanded.

Dick turned his binoculars to watch the fight that emerged on the roof of Block A. Deathstroke wasn’t among them.

A few troops landed on the other side of the greenhouse corridor; Dick heard their screams as they were caught in whatever traps Zatanna had set up.

This was all going too smooth.

_‘I’ve got eyes on Deathstroke,’_ Arsenal reported.

_‘I’m heading down,’_ M’gann said at the same time, and Dick followed her with his look. Why would she..?

And then he saw a black streak across the farther side of the campus.

_Shit._ M’gann was going for the speedster!

_‘Arsenal, can you keep Slade busy for a few minutes?’_ He asked quickly.

_‘What do you take me for?’_

_‘Great, hang in there, I’ll be right with you.’_

He jumped off the roof.

When Dick reached the ground and set off across the yard, M’gann already had the speedster squashed on the grass with her mental powers.

He did not even think twice, swiping over his belt, and the air crackled with blasts from stun grenades. M’gann quivered, covering her head, but that was enough to break her concentration. Dick ran in between her and the speedster.

‘Run, you idiot!’ He shooed him. The speedster slowly rose from the ground cradling his head; he looked at Dick with immense fear written all over his face. ‘Go!’

Not wasting a moment, he zipped off. Dick hurried to M’gann’s side.

‘Are you okay?’ He asked, catching her by the shoulders.

‘Did you just use stun me?!’ She snarled. He shrugged sheepishly. ‘Are you out of your mind? I had him!’

‘You were going to mind-blast him!’

‘You _promised_!’

‘I promised Kaldur I will follow his orders. He did not order me _not_ to try saving him.’

M’gann slammed her fist on his chest, but backed down.

_‘Kaldur, the speedster is here, he’s coming for you,’_ she said on the mind link.

_‘Bit late on that report,’_ their leader replied, but he did not sound distressed. _‘I see him. Leave him to me, you and Dick go after Deathstroke and see what his minions have planned_.’

‘ _Roger_ ,’ Dick replied. In all honesty, he should’ve been there with Kaldur, help him protect the microchip and have another go at getting through to Wally. But, well, he _promised_. ‘Let’s go,’ he urged M’gann out loud.

Still furious, she rolled her eyes but followed him.

Kaldur raised his weapons and swung them leisurely, commanding the water to trickle towards and around the safebox, and then raised the pools from the ground, forming a uniform wall to cover it.

‘I can’t let you take it,’ he said calmly. The speedster took a few steps to the left, eyeing the container behind him, but kept his distance. ‘The men you’re working for will use it for evil.’

The speedster gave him a small mean grin.

_It’s probably the same thing_ they _were telling him too_.

He zipped to the other side of the room and made a go at the barrier, but as soon as he touched the water wall, he hissed and quickly jumped backwards.

‘Careful, it’s boiling,’ Kaldur explained. He had no intention of hurting him… but he was not going to make it easy for him to take the microchip.

The speedster circled around him, probably realizing he would have to take out Aquaman before he could get his hands on the target. He looked cautious. Not exactly like Wally – who probably would’ve already tried slamming into him; he had always been impatient.

_Not Wally_ , Kaldur had to remind himself again. That’s right, this was an enemy. Deathstroke’s pawn.

This was the first time he faced the speedster in the flesh, and now he understood why Dick had been so persistent. It was hard looking at him and not seeing all the little things, all the minor details which made memories surface.

The speedster made a quick jab at him, but Kaldur repelled it with ease with a water shield. Just like they had been trained; back in the day, both the Flash and Wally himself had taught the team how to fight speedsters, _just in case_. If need be, Kaldur knew he could take him.

He did not very much _want to_.

The speedster attacked again, and they exchanged a few blows.

And then the floor under them rattled.

_‘Slade used a seismic bomb!’_ Dick screamed over the mind link. _‘It’s gonna bring the whole building down!’_

Kaldur hurried to the window. Block A of the lab already had a huge crack in its outer wall, and smoke was starting to roll.

There were dozens of people inside.

He could use his magic to hold the buildings together until they evacuate everyone, but that would mean leaving-

He looked over his shoulder.

The chip case was still in place, but the speedster was gone already. Kaldur quickly glanced outside; he saw a black streak disappearing into Block A.

He huffed under his breath, even a little ashamed that it was his opponent who first cast aside the mission to run and help people.

He hurried to the safebox, lowered the water wall, opened the safebox and took out the microchip, hiding it in his belt, then put up the water wall again. They weren't going to lose this time.

He immediately crashed through the window, landed on his feet and ran across the yard drawing water from nearby fountains, irrigation hoses and pipes. He swirled the huge stream into a gigantic water rope and, swinging his arms slowly over his head, surrounded the whole building with it.

_‘Miss M, go up! We need you to hold Block B from falling apart with your telekinesis,’_ he commanded. _‘I’ll hold Block A. Nightwing, report on Deathstroke?!’_

_‘He escaped, I’m gonna-’_

_‘Forget him, you lead the evacuation, I want the Team and the League on this asap! Start with my side, I can already see fire breaking out.’_

_‘Which side is that?’_

_‘Explosions should give you a good clue.’_

_‘Har har,’_ Dick snarked, but his voice was serious. _‘Tigress, bring the Bioship over to Aquaman, we’ll use it to transport anyone who can’t walk, you and your team cover the ground. SB, RA, into Block A, Wonder Girl, Zee, Arsenal, Block B...’_

Kaldur continued to listen to Dick’s commands with only a fraction of focus, turning it all to holding the water restraints on the building. Lumps of the walls already started peeling off, and he had to split it into smaller streams to keep debris from falling on civilians who started pouring through the front and side doors.

Once or twice he registered a black blur near the exits, but he would disappear again - only leaving a couple of disoriented scientists outside every time.

_What a day._

Artemis landed the Bioship as close as was safe for it not to fall under fire, and immediately got outside. Flames were already licking the roofs and walls of both blocks, she saw M’gann hovering high in the air above Block B out of their reach, but Kaldur was on the ground and was probably not too happy with taking so much heat. She ran up to him, Halo and Thirteen close behind her.

‘Aquaman, your orders?’

He gave her a short look.

‘Help the civilians leave the yard as soon as possible. I believe the inside is covered, we should have everyone out soon. Don’t know about the other Block, Nightwing will call in, but let’s deal with this first, there’s much more fire here.’

She nodded and hurried to the nearest exit; Conner broke outside with like six people tossed over his back like sacks and gave her a grin.

_‘How are we doing in there?’_ She asked over the mind link.

_‘Only the upper storeys are left, we’ll be clear soon,’_ he explained.

_‘Wow, this is faster than I expected!’_ She helped people climb off Conner’s back. ‘M’am, please, could you help your colleague here? Take your time, you’re safe now, but please keep moving towards that red ship over there,’ she pointed at the Bioship and gently pushed two scientists in its direction, then the others to follow them.

_‘We have help.’_

She wanted to ask - but then she saw him.

A black blur. He beelined out of the building and braked right in front of her, lowered the man he had been carrying to the ground and almost shoved him at her.

It was barely a second. A tiny look, when he handed over the technician, an accidental brush of hands - and it was just like she’d travelled back in time. Not ages, no, not that long - just three years, to the last time she had seen highlights flicker in his hair from the fires. The last time she had seen those lips smile.

He wasn’t smiling now; it lasted just a fraction of a second, and he zipped back into the building again, and something cramped inside her.

_‘Arty.’_

She ground her teeth.

‘Arty,’ Conner called out loud now. She felt the weight behind his look, but couldn’t meet it. ‘I’m going back inside.’

She drew a sharp breath. ‘Okay. I’ll handle it here.’

Conner gave her another look, but then disappeared into the building again.

She nudged the technician on the side, tugging his arm more comfortably over her shoulder.

‘Hey… Josh,’ her look slid down to the man’s name tag. ‘Why don’t you lean on me. Yes, like this, let’s go. We only have to reach that red ship and you will be okay. Does it hurt?’

The technician, Josh Hawkins by the name tag, shook his head, but there was a sheen of sweat on his brow, and his free hand clawed into her side so hard she was probably going to get bruises.

She could barely feel it, counting their steps as they moved.

_‘That’s everyone in Block A,’_ Superboy landed on the ground after jumping from the fifth floor. Kaldur waited a few more seconds, then released the stream and dropped on his knees. His tattoos still shone from the strain, and his muscles burned, and there was static in his ears. Conner ran up to him.

‘I’m fine,’ Kaldur reassured him. ‘Go help Tigress load and treat everyone, and clear the road for the fire brigades.’

‘And the other block?’

‘They should be nearing the end too. I’ll go check.’

Conner shrugged but didn’t contest, only helped him stand up, and they ran off in separate directions.

_‘Nightwing, what’s the status on Block B?’_ Kaldur asked over mind link.

_‘Peachy. I mean. Just great. Fire all around, we’re so hot right now.’_

_‘Har har,’_ Kaldur smirked, mimicking Dick’s previous snark. _‘Hang in there, I’ll bring over water.’_

_‘Much appreciated. Fourth floor.’_

Kaldur collected a new stream from the water that was left and hurled it up at the building, then used a few streams to propel himself off the ground to the fourth floor. He immediately saw Nightwing struggle to pull two people from under the debris, and flooded the floor with his magic, putting out the flames and washing the debris away.

‘Nice,’ Dick grinned at him. ‘But you probably shouldn’t stick around for too long, there’s no telling when the fire will break out again.’

‘Not too long. Here, let me help,’ he pulled one man over his back.

They scurried along the corridor checking each room as they passed, but they all appeared empty.

_‘Could that be everyone? M’gann, could you see how many people are still in the building?’_

_‘I can see you… Wait, there’s three more on the top floor, I’ll try flying them out.’_

_‘Don’t get too close.'_

_'I won’t.’_

They turned another corner just in time to evade another explosion from behind; it blasted out the windows, but that was no way out – they were still too high in the building.

They needed the staircase, get down at least a couple more levels-

Or, well, the building could do that for them.

Kaldur only had the time to gasp before the floor parted open and swallowed them into an inferno.

As soon as M’gann landed the last three people next to the Bioship, more of the lab’s storeys bloomed with explosions, raining glass and debris all over; the fire most likely reached some flammable chemicals, because it was turning green now, and rose up in the sky in balls of flame.

Block A was completely engulfed in fires, the heat down on the ground was almost unbearable and she hid behind the ship to catch her breath.

Another outburst of explosions, and she saw Nightwing crash through the second storey window with another man on his shoulders, slam on the ground and roll over several times.

Artemis and Conner immediately ran towards him.

_‘Kaldur?’_ M’gann followed them, checking the building with her mind.

Silence over the telepathic link was telling.

‘He’s still in there,’ Dick moaned, rising on his hands, ‘we got blasted, the floor broke under us, I didn’t see him after that, I have to go back-’

Kaldur had become so powerful, and flames were barely a weakness to him anymore, but the wild explosions that were raging in the building might’ve shaken even him.

_‘Kaldur, come in,’_ M’gann repeated over the mind link, and there was an urgency in her thoughts. _‘Kaldur!’_

If he could not hear her, he was most likely unconscious.

No answer.

M’gann looked at Conner with panic in her eyes.

‘We have to get-’ Dick tried to stand up, but had probably hit his head falling because his legs swayed and he dropped backwards; Artemis caught him and lowered him to the ground.

‘Stay put!’ Conner ordered; both he and M’gann dashed towards the building. She tensed and rose in the air-

‘ _Wait,_ ’ Conner gripped her by the arm.

A black blur flashed past them towards the crackling building. He ran up the wall on the outside in disappeared in an abundance of brown smoke and flames somewhere in the upper floors.

M’gann tensed, but Conner put his hand on her shoulder.

‘Wait,’ he urged.

‘What if he went in to take him?!’

‘I don’t think that’s his intent,’ Conner said calmly. ‘You saw him. I think we can trust him.’

Indeed, after a few seconds that lasted an eternity, a black streak escaped the wreck riding on the wave of explosive force, got a footing on the wall he had first climbed up, and ran down its side. He skidded to a stop just a few feet away from the Bioship, where all the heroes were waiting.

He had Kaldur lumped over his shoulders, and another man under his right arm.

Not breaking eye contact with M’gann, the speedster carefully lowered both the civilian and Kaldur to the ground and took a few steps back, crouching like a wary animal. Dick and M’gann quickly approached, she knelt beside Kaldur and checked his breathing and pulse, Dick did the same for the other man. M’gann then looked at the speedster again.

His white irises still kept throwing her off, because she _knew_ what his eyes were supposed to look like… But there was something _vivid_ in his look now.

She felt water pool behind her eyes.

‘They are going to be okay,’ she whispered, cradling Kaldur’s head. ‘You saved them… Thank you, Wally,’ she said louder, even though her voice broke, and smiled at him.

Apparently satisfied, the speedster straightened up.

This was finally their chance, their goal, _their true mission_.

Standing up, Dick patted M’gann on the shoulder, but his eyes were only fixed _on him_. He stepped over Kaldur’s legs and reached up with his hand.

‘You should come back with us,’ he urged, stretching his palm.

The speedster looked at him wary, his eyes darting all over the crowd, and Dick could actually see him struggle with whatever hesitations he had, and even shake a little.

‘You saw what Deathstroke did, you know what they are now,’ he encouraged again. ‘You don’t have to go back to them. You can come with us… You belong with heroes, Wally.’ 

At those words, the speedster - _Wally_ \- broke into a smile,

that, _that smile_ -

gosh, it was nothing short of _blinding_ -

Beyond their wildest expectations, he reached for Dick’s hand too.

His heart jumping and a current rattling his knees, Dick immediately stepped forward - but Wally retracted his hand before he could grab it. He met Dick’s eyes now, maybe for the first time, _really looked_ \- and his wide smile turned timid.

He was still afraid of something.

Finally, he chuckled - and then gave them all a corny two-finger salute, spun on his heel like a whirlwind, and ran off into the distance.

Dick blinked, his brows rising high and his hand still in the air.

_What just… happened?_

‘D- did you guys… did you see that?’ He mumbled.

‘Sure did.’

‘Yup.’

‘He totally left you hanging.’

Dick snorted and looked over his shoulder at Artemis, who appeared smirking but had her lips pursed tight to keep them from shaking.

‘He’s playing hard to get.’

‘But the two-finger salute, did you see that?!’

‘Yeah. Typical Wally. Can’t even remember his name, but the obnoxious habits? He sure does,’ Artemis commented again.

They all laughed.

‘Let’s move out of here,’ Conner urged, kneeling down and picking up Kaldur, and Dick raised the civilian. They hurried into the Bioship.

***

M’gann caught up with him on the stairs to the wards.

‘Are you going to see Kaldur?’ She asked.

‘Yes.’

Their leader had been out for a few hours, but as soon as he woke he sent for all of them.

Their steps were light and barely audible, and still, they were the only sound as they climbed.

‘Dick, wait,’ she finally spoke when they reached their floor. ‘I’m sorry.’

He glanced at her.

‘I was wrong,’ M’gann said, casting down her head. ‘I was so focused on the emptiness of his mind, that I could not see that his heart was still there. I… I believe now.’

Dick huffed.

‘You know, nothing makes me happier than you being wrong,’ he said with a small smile. She squinted at him, but chuckled. ‘At least about this. All that matters now is what we do with it.’

‘I believe that’s why Kaldur summoned us.’

‘Let’s go find out?’

They entered Kaldur’s ward. Conner and Artemis were already there.

‘How’s our fearless leader?’ Dick asked.

‘Rejuvenated,’ he replied, steepling his hands under his chin. He gave everyone _a look_. ‘So the mission was a disaster.’

Dick snorted.

‘Yet somehow,’ Kaldur’ahm continued, ‘we did not fail. We did not get Slade - but we did not let him get away with the microchip either. It was destroyed - but it didn’t fall into the Light’s hands. The lab was greatly damaged in the fire - but there were no serious casualties.’

‘Batman would give us a look of utter disappointment, but would not forever ground us,’ Artemis commented under her breath, and Dick had to chuckle. Kaldur smirked too.

‘True. We all did our part, not least of all… the speedster,’ he finished. ‘We would not have been able to save all those people without him. Not to mention I owe him my life.’

The air filled with anticipation as he spoke.

‘I made my decision,’ he finished. ‘Wally or not Wally… he’s a good person. He’s a hero.’

‘So what now?’ Conner asked. Kaldur rested his brow on his steepled hands, then looked up at Dick.

‘It is time I listen to you,’ he conceded. ‘We owe it to him to try and get him out of Deathstroke and Luthor’s claws. Nightwing, will you lead us on this mission?’

Dick gave him a tired smile. ‘Thought you’d never ask.’

They all exchanged looks again.

‘Down with the old crew,’ Artemis whispered. 

There were no more ifs or doubts or misgivings.

They were going to get him back.

***

‘Who told you to do that!?’ Slade fumed, gripping the speedster by the neck. ‘You’re supposed to _only_ do what I tell you. Or else I have no use for you!’

The speedster did not answer, his look perpetually fixed on the floor.

‘Who told you to do that?’ Slade repeated. ‘Answer me!’

‘No one,’ he replied, quiet but somehow resolute.

‘You just _decided_ to?!’

His nod was almost imperceptible. Slade roared and slapped him across the face. The speedster bent down a little, but remained still.

‘They were in danger,’ he muttered.

‘Who was?!’

The speedster blinked. ‘People. In those buildings. In the fire. Helping people is good.’

Deathstroke growled. The blunt simpleton logic was driving him nuts.

‘Nobody asked for your opinion! You don’t do what you’re not told to! Not only you didn’t get the chip and now it’s _destroyed,_ on top of that, you even rescued Aquaman!’

The speedster hesitated again. ‘Aquaman. Aquaman is… good.’

‘Well, he isn’t wrong about _that_ ,’ Luthor interrupted with an amused smirk on his face. ‘Calm down, Slade. We told him the good shall prevail in our work, so the kid took initiative, all very well. However, kid… You must remember that those people, they call themselves heroes… but they don’t see the threats that we do. They might become an obstacle if we want to save the world.’

The speedster glanced up at Luthor and pursed his lips, and shuffled in his spot.

‘He’s still good,’ he mumbled stubbornly. ‘And Nightwing, and the S-man, and the Martian, they were all good.’

Luthor smiled, approached and patted him on the shoulder. ‘Absolutely. You keep up the spirit.’

He motioned with his head for Slade to follow.

‘I see now what you were concerned about,’ he said when they left the cell and it clicked closed. Wilson scoffed.

‘Told you. If he starts acting on his own, he’s more trouble than he’s worth.’

‘I will email the customer support at our dear overlord, maybe he can be reset or something.’

Slade responded with an eye roll.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's all for today, folks, the remaining chapters still need a little polishing. Let's take a deep breath while the Team prepares for the biggest mission yet, and pray they are not too late.
> 
> Also, my apologies to Miss Martian fans if she feels ooc. To me, she is the one character who would know how to separate mission and emotion and keep a clear head, but I'm not sure I didn't overdo it with her arguing so stubbornly against saving Wally.


	8. Cleansing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wally wakes up tied to a lab chair.  
> Dr Bedlam has plans for him, and he's sure he's not going to like it.  
> Maybe he should've taken that hand.

He tried to rise, but could not move at all. There were tight straps across his chest, stomach, in several spots over his legs, arms and wrists, his head completely immobilized too.

His breathing quickened, and he shut his eyes to try and calm down.

Almost every morning he’d wake up not knowing where or why or who he was, but never like this. This felt wrong, the ropes, something, something was wrong… 

He ground his teeth and tried to struggle again, only to make the belts etch into his skin.

Wait, he was going about this all wrong. He was trained for this! Nothing could catch him, nothing could hold him… He just has to settle down and start vibrating and get out!

Okay, breathe. Breathe, start slow, imagine - each of your molecules has a life of their own.

Sometimes he liked to think of them all as people – his body a huge city and they – its crazy residents. The ones that made up his legs would definitely be arrogant jocks - come on, did you know how fast they made _the city_ run just yesterday? His brain molecules must be pretty annoying, too, he felt like they knew a lot, but did not share it with anyone, clearly, they were keeping secrets even from him. He sniggered privately when he thought about them arguing endlessly with his hair molecules who wanted nothing to do with the brain-wrecking stuff and just wanted to be pretty (so okay, he liked the way his hair fell after a good run, what’s wrong with that?)

Nononono, wrong thing to focus on. Right. Focus. Focus, guys, we need to move _the city_ out of whatever predicament he got himself into this time. He didn’t _know_ , didn’t remember enough of himself to know, but somehow he felt he got into those a lot. At least it meant he would also _get out_ a lot.

Now, to start vibrating, all as one, one, two… 

‘Fruitless effort.’ A cold voice from behind shook him to the core, and he twitched in his constraints, trying to turn and see who the voice belonged to.

He didn’t need to, though. He remembered. Bedlam. Fuck. He really thought he had escaped that hell.

‘You cannot use your powers with an inhibitor on,’ the doctor said methodically, coming into view with his hands behind his back.

Horrified he realized the doctor was not lying. His molecules did not move. He should’ve been out of it already! Instead, it felt like the ropes tightened.

Bedlam leaned over him. ‘Darkseid’s allies say you have developed free will where there had been none. Let us test that. _Darkseid is_.’

That!

Fuck! That… 

That was the codeword. The one that used to make his mind go blank.

This time he only growled, and clacked his teeth, and bristled like a feral dog.

_Isn’t!_

Though seemingly impossible, the doctor’s face got even darker and crueller.

‘Unbelievable. Intolerable. I knew Granny’s methods would prove unreliable. It is time to remake you into our lord Darkseid’s servant proper. And I had such high hopes for you, 11514.’

No! Nononono, that was a number, not a name, that’s not who he was! He was, he was…

The three iffy men called him _kid_ , and he was quite okay with it, it didn’t sound bad, but that was not who he was either.

 _Wally_.

That’s what the kind man with the blue bird on his chest called him. What _Nightwing_ called him. _Wally_.

He had liked the sound of it. He wanted to be Wally. It felt like the name meant something, at least to that man. And the other one, with the red S on his chest, who invited him to work on the motorcycle. And Aquaman, who looked like their king or something, who attacked him at first but then they both saved many people together out of that burning wreck. And that girl who set fire in his mind, but later thanked him for his help and her voice sounded like she was about to cry.

‘Not… that,’ he growled, eyes almost bulging out of his sockets. ‘I’m. I am. Wally!’

The look Bedlam gave him was pure violence.

‘You don’t have a name, insect. You are but a pebble on the road paved to Darkseid’s victory. I had enough of your insolence. We shall start the procedure.’

Wally rattled his constraints again, feeling panic swell in his stomach. He did not know what the procedure was going to be, but if he remembered anything about Bedlam, it was that he was going to make it as painful as possible.

And he did not want to be Darkseid’s insect again. He did not want to fight for something he had no control of at the snap of someone’s fingers. He wanted to- 

The doctor injected something into a vein in his right arm. It didn’t even sting. He then went around and did the same on his left arm. What, that’s it?

There was a dull ache in his toes now, but it wasn’t that bad, maybe he could live through th-

The white-hot pain that struck him now was mind-bending. It did not come in bouts or waves, it just exploded inside him all at once, making him acutely aware of each fucking organ, each damn cell - and it did not recede, but only got sharper and sharper and _sharper…_

Almost immediately he realized he was losing grip on his consciousness, and black dots started flashing in his sight.

No. No. No! He did not want to lose it. _Forget_. He wanted to change, but not like that! To become Wally, not forget it all!

_…and sharper and sharper and sharper…_

His fingers coiled and his legs twisted. His back bent up as much as the belts would allow, etching into his skin. Bedlam was hovering somewhere around his head, did he do something else, injected something again? Or was he trying to crack his skull open?

It was all irrelevant, he felt so distant from it now he could be on another dimension entirely.

He tried to stop breathing; god, if he stopped breathing, this would end.

… _and sharper…_

He opened his mouth to scream, only nothing came out but a gasp, his throat too strained and he was probably going to dislocate his jaw, and his bulging eyes pooled up.

… _and sharper and sharper…_

He should’ve taken that hand. Nightwing. He gave him his hand and called him Wally, and he should’ve taken it, he should’ve not been scared, and gone with him and be free, and he would see that smile again; it was a sad smile, but kind, and he probably had pretty eyes, _blue eyes_ , that’s right! And his hand was probably warm,

_… and cold and cold and COLDER…_

now his veins are freezing over; he started tossing about in his constraints, sputtering, contorted, eyes and nose running 

_sharper_

blue, blue, take his hand, please, Nightwing, please help him, he’ll be good, he’ll never run from you again, just save him, please, why can’t you take my hand now, save him, Night-, Nightwing, why won’t you help him, Ro- Rob, please

… _and sharper… shar…_

… _per…_

Not Rob.

Dick.

Tears travelled down his cheeks, and his temples, and reached his ears and even his neck, leaving hot traces on his freezing skin.

 _and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper DICK and sharper and sharper and sharper DICK and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper DICK IT’S ME IT’S WALLY HELP ME and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper ARTY and colder and colder ARTY PLEASE and colder and colder and colder and colder and colder and colder and sharper and sharper and sharper CONNER M’GANN KALDUR ZEE and sharper and sharper and sharper ROY ROY HELP and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper UNCLE BARRY I CAN’T KEEP UP and sharper and sharper and sharper PLEASE WAIT FOR ME and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and colder and colder and sharper DICK and colder_ _and sharper GUYS WAIT and sharper DON’T LEAVE ME I’M SORRY and sharper and blacker and sharper and blacker and blacker and sharper and sharper sharper sharper DICK PLEASE- and sharper and sharper and sharper DICK and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper DICK and sharper and sharper I’m sorry I’m sorry and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper Dick and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper Dick and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and sharper and-_

\- _and_ _sharper -_

When the kid finally broke into a scream, even Slade could not stay in the room. The howl was clearly audible even after he closed the door to the prep chamber, where Luthor was working on his laptop.

He cast a short glance at the hitman and grimaced.

‘Can’t stomach a little screaming?’ he commented. Slade pursed his lips.

‘Nothing I haven’t heard before.’

‘Indeed. Still unpleasant. And lo, Vandal might take issue with what we did to him.’

‘I don’t like it either, but if it gets the kid under control, I’ll live,’ he left, slamming the door.


	9. Red Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Team set out on a mission to rescue Wally. A tracker leads them to an old mining facility in a desert, under which the Light operates a lab.  
> But they have been too late.

This one of the Light’s hideouts sat on the slopes of a small canyon on the edge of a rocky wilderness, overlooking a small ancient crater. Kaldur and Conner voted for walking up to the front door in the middle of the day with their heads held high and demanding the Light just to give the speedster up. Dick went with it; it wasn’t his preferred MO, but they would make a great distraction while he enters through the back to see what else is going on.

He left Artemis on guard and snuck inside by the back door and slunk along a grey corridor, at the same time tuned in to a video feed from the team as they approached the front gate with the Super-Cycle.

Deathstroke was already waiting for them before the gate. Behind him, he had Killer Frost, Shimmer, Mammoth and, of course, the speedster in line.

Wasn’t that just too easy.

Something looked off, though. Dick focused his camera on the speedster; this time, he was wearing a bright red suit instead of the previous asphalt-grey one, and the bolt on his chest was yet another shade of red. Red goggles covered his eyes, too.

Dick watched the team get off the Cycle and walk closer to the gate. Deathstroke moved to meet them-

An electric charge zapped him as his gear short-circuited and he even stumbled, startled by unexpected pain.

Another video feed showed up in his lenses. ‘Hello, Nightwing,’ Luthor smiled at him.

He gasped, set against the wall, gripping his temples.

‘How do you like our base?’

_ ‘He hacked my signal? How the fuck did he hack my signal!?’  _ Barbara’s voice sounded in his ear, but it was dampened by static. Luthor shrugged, giving him a smile.

‘I just wanted to share the news on our mutual friend,’ he said.

In his other feed, Dick watched Slade and his minions, Wally included, all attack the team.

‘Where’s Nightwing?’ Slade asked them grinning. ‘Probably sneaking around back, isn’t he. Too bad… He won’t see my new secret weapon.’

‘We came to take him with us,’ Aquaman answered calmly. ‘Release him, and we can part ways peacefully.’

‘Peace is overrated. I’m very much interested in a fight today.’

In his hand, Slade had some sort of device; it looked Apokolyptan. He tossed it leisurely in the air, caught it, and pointed it at Aquaman.

The speedster zipped up front and attacked him, striking him on the chest; luckily, he did not get another one in, as Conner rushed at Slade; the hitman waved the device, and the speedster wheeled around and skid to a stop in front of Deathstroke, taking the brunt of Conner’s fist, sagging to the ground. Conner quickly jumped back.

‘Sorry!’ He said hurriedly, lowering his hands. ‘I didn't mean to-’

The speedster rose from the ground again, somehow limp, and took the same position, shielding the hitman.

‘Don’t defend them, my friend,’ Kaldur urged patiently. ‘If that is your wish, we won’t attack him. We just came to help you.’

The speedster did not react.

He was still hunched, but somehow, did not look scared anymore, not like before, instead, he looked  _ absent _ .

‘Ah, Aquaman,’ Slade grimaced. ‘He does not want your help. I don’t think he’s capable of wanting anything now. Come on,’ he pointed the device again, ‘take them.’

His gang moved.

‘He’s been…  _ modified  _ since the last time you met him,’ Luthor explained shrugging as Dick stared at the video of both teams fighting. ‘You can imagine we could not let him keep running around  _ saving the Justice League _ .’

‘What did you do to him?!’ His voice was a low growl.

‘Do you really think this distasteful tone will work on me?’

Dick snarled, but rubbed his temples and relaxed against the corridor wall. ‘You dialled me, Lex. I assume it’s for a reason. So, talk.’

The Secretary smirked.

‘Look carefully,’ he urged. ‘The kid… Your speedster has a control chip on his neck. Deathstroke holds the control rod, you can see it. With it, he does what you want, that’s how half of Darkseid’s army operates. I sent an unlock sequence to your feed… Break the control device, reprogram the chip, and he might return to normal.’

‘Might?’

‘Or he might go full berserk, kill you all and then die when his body runs out of juice,’ Lex replied matter-of-factly. ‘Vandal said he’d seen that happen a lot with Darkseid’s pawns too.’

Dick exhaled, curling his fists. Sure, he knew Luthor most likely wanted to incite fear. And that he was most likely playing him. But what choice did he have?

‘ _ It’s a trap, _ ’ Oracle’s message flashed.

He knew that too.

‘Why did you tell me all this?’ He asked. ‘What do you want?’

‘Me? Oh, I want nothing. Can’t a man just be nice? The kid must’ve earned a spot in my heart.’

‘Right,’ Dick grunted.

‘Would it stop you, knowing I also have something to gain from this endeavour?’ Luthor had a self-satisfied smirk on his face; if he were here, Dick would definitely punch him.

He sighed privately. Would it, really..? What was their mission here..?

_ ‘Miss M, SB, Aquaman,’  _ he reached out over the mind link, ‘ _ Deathstroke has some sort of an Apokoliptan device.’ _

_ ‘We see it,’  _ Kaldur confirmed.

_ ‘He uses it to control… Wally. Take it off him at any cost and then wait for me, I have instructions. Tigress, head to the team, this is top priority now, I will meet you out there.’ _

Affirmations came his way, and he focused back on Luthor, who chuckled.

‘Good luck on your quest, heroes.’

***

‘Come on, come on, hold him!’

The speedster struggled violently, trying to break free. Conner brought him to the ground, clasping his arms firmly around his chest from behind, while Kaldur jumped on his legs, and Dick gripped his arms and midsection.

Even with the three of them, it felt like trying to hold down a tornado, and they knew every second counted, he could have vibrated out of their grasp at any moment.

M’gann crawled closer and fiddled with the chip on the side of his neck to move it, but it was etched into his skin too tight.

‘Come on, Wally, just a little patience, we’re trying to help you,’ she mumbled under her breath as she gripped his neck to keep it still, and then put the control key on the chip, and it stuck like a magnet.

The control rod started glowing dark purple, and then something cracked.

With a swift wide move, she rooted the device up, and the chip came off too; horrified, they saw two thick two-inch steel needles come out of Wally’s neck, dripping red.

His struggle immediately died down, he gasped for air, and gargled, and sputtered blood that rose to his mouth.

M’gann whined, pressing her palm to the little holes on his neck, red seeping through the gaps between her fingers. ‘He’s bleeding, what do we do-’

‘It’s okay,’ Dick said, releasing Wally’s waist and methodically putting a small roll of bandage under her palm. ‘He’s a speedster. Look, he’s healing already.’

True enough, though still wet and gaspy, his breathing started evening down. He sagged against Conner’s chest, and Conner tugged him up to lay more comfortably, cradling his head.

M’gann sniffled, still pressing the bandage to the wounds.

‘It’s all okay now, Walls, we got you, you’re going to be okay,’ Dick whispered, leaning over his face and carefully pulling the goggles off his eyes.

His eyelashes fluttered, and then he looked straight at Dick.

He only let out a tiny gasp.

‘No-’   


Like a whirlwind, the speedster slammed into all of them, clocking Conner on the nose, smashing his palm into Dick’s Adam’s apple and furiously kicking Kaldur on the stomach to even send him flying a few feet.

M’gann only had the time to squeak-

He gripped her neck with both his hands and blasted off.

And then the mind link died.

Almost instantly, Conner roared and scrambled from the ground after them.

His pulse beating in his ears, Dick coughed and wheezed, cradling his throat,  _ fuck it hurt _ , but it didn’t matter, it didn’t matter, his mind was too empty, it shouldn’t have been so empty, there should’ve been voices-

He looked up and saw Kaldur rise.

‘What happened? M’gann..?’ He asked, his voice trembling.

‘Red eyes,’ Dick replied heavily, ‘he had red eyes. We failed, it didn’t work, he..!’

Kaldur looked at him with terror in his eyes.

‘ _What did we do?_ ’

Dick and Kaldur scrambled over the edge of the crater and only had a few moments to register Tigress roar and drop in between the berserk speedster and Shimmer; apparently, he was targeting even the Light’s hitters now, no wonder they kept a respectable distance.

Horrified, Dick realized Zatanna was also down, succumbed in the corner behind rubble. His heart sank.

Artemis sent the speedster flying with her staff, but he was back on his feet too fast.

‘Get back! Get back, don’t engage!’ Dick shouted, sliding down the slope, but it was too late. The speedster charged at her and rammed her into a wall - and a moment later she sagged over his back, and he let her body slide to the ground.

There were screams all around now, they almost tore his ears open. People ran, and his legs ran too - but he felt detached, as if watching himself from a distance, like a movie playing in slow motion before his eyes.

It took some time for him to realize he was the one screaming.

He fell on the speedster like hail, slamming his escrima sticks into his neck, and he tumbled several times over, but then dashed on his feet; Dick had been too slow, the speedster spun out of his reach again; with a precise smash of an elbow, he hit Dick square on the chest and sent him flying again.

Kaldur was right behind him, he slashed the air with his water whips and pressed on; a few furious attacks must’ve hit the mark, because the speedster growled and zipped away a few hundred yards. Kaldur ran after him.

‘Check on her, she might still be alive!’ He commanded.

Dick rose on his hands again. Artemis was curled into an embryo with no sign of movement, and he whined.

‘Arty! Arty!’ he called, crawling towards her, ‘come on, you’re tougher than this, you can’t, you can’t be-’

_ Crack _ , and he whipped his head up.

The speedster was standing idly over a heap on the ground that was Kaldur.

Dick gripped his weapons and sprang up, but stopped just a few steps in.

The speedster was looking straight at him.

\---

_ Kid Flash gripped his shoulder. _

_ ‘Wait… are- are you going to Cadmus? Because if you’re going, I’m going!’ _

_ They didn’t even have to say it out loud. They both turned to Kaldur with conspirative grins on their faces. _

_ They were a team, just like that. _

\---

_ ‘Hey. Need your help.’ _

_ ‘What, that’s it? Not even a ‘hello Wall-man I’ve missed you how’ve you been’?’ _

_ A pause. Well, that was true, they weren’t talking much these days- _

_ ‘Okay, okay, where to?’ _

_ He didn’t even get the time to roll his eyes. _

_ \--- _

_ ‘... always someone in some mess. I know you’re great and all, and we do what we must, but… Well. This isn’t our usual ‘covert recon only no explosions op’, ‘s all I’m saying.’ _

_ Dick chuckled at the way Wally mimicked Batman’s voice. He really did feel guilty about recruiting Artemis after they had retired. And Wally was right, a lot was riding on this mission, it was very likely going to be more than they could handle. _

_ ‘You know you can tell me, right? If you end up in over your head? If I can help?’ Wally said, suddenly all serious, as if having read his thoughts. ‘Even if I disagree and I’m mad at you, which, believe me, I am… But I’m still on your side.’ _

\---

He dropped his escrima sticks to the ground. He wasn’t going to fight him.

‘ _ Dick, what the hell are you doing!? _ ’ Oracle now screamed over the comms, ‘ _ get out! Get away from him now! Dick, don’t do this, I beg you, no, please- _ ’

He tuned out his lenses, then took his communicator out of his ear and flicked it into the rubble. He felt guilty for doing that to Babs, but very soon now, it was not going to matter.

The berserk not-Wally swept up behind him, and he realized he was being dragged backwards at nauseating speed. Then they stopped, and Dick slammed into the speedster, who then caught Dick’s neck with his fingers, and the next thing he knew, his head was locked in the speedster’s grip.

He knew what was coming next. He had seen M’gann, and Zee, and Artemis, and Kaldur.

But he couldn’t make himself rage, or fight, or even hate him. Yes, he could hate himself plenty.  _ He  _ insisted that they try to free him, get Wally back and fuck all consequences, and it did not work, and now they were dead-

It was all on him; not on Wally. Even if they all die here at Wally’s hands, he  _ can’t _ hate him.

_ That’s how much I was prepared to risk. How much I wanted him to come back. _

_ To tell me that he’s forgiven me. _

He knew what was coming next, and he could not hold back anymore; water pooled behind his eyes, because he wanted him back so bad, but  _ it’s not Wally…  _

‘I’m sorry,’ he whispered under his breath. Not to the speedster, more like… To the real him. His best friend, his partner, the one he was unable to save. Again. ‘It’s all my fault, all this mess… Wally, if you can hear me… I’m sorry.’

The speedster stepped even closer behind his back, and his muscles tensed, but there was that familiar welcoming warmth enveloping him now, and he sank into it, closing his eyes.

‘Play dead,’ the speedster muttered, and Dick could swear he did not even have to  _ play _ , his heart just  _ stopped _ . But the speedster turned his neck in his hands to imitate snapping, and he obeyed, going limp. The speedster caught him and lowered him to the ground, laying him down on his stomach, and covered Dick’s eyes with his palm.

‘You have nothing to be sorry for,’ he mumbled. ‘Wait for my signal.’

He blasted off, and it took Dick all the will he had not to jump on his feet after him, and his pulse beat frantically, but he stayed still, counting his breaths.   


Conner stopped before him in a fighting stance but did not attack. He was grinning.

M’gann had told him; Wally had asked her to break the mind link and put up all the mental defences she had, because Savage had Psimon hiding somewhere near, and he did not want his plan found by the telepath running through all of their minds.

‘Bring it, twinkle-toes,’ he teased, lowering his fists. The speedster smirked, raised his hand and showed a full palm, then two fingers up.

‘Seven?’

‘What? That’s the only one I remember,’ Wally laughed, and Conner beamed too.

‘Maneuver seven coming up!’ He roared, hurtled at Wally, who jumped and got fastballed onto the top of the crater.

That was the signal, and the whole battlefield came alive. Dick was on his feet immediately, glancing around. He was just a few feet from Killer Frost, who started backing away slowly.

With the corner of his eye, he saw Tigress spring from the ground and deck Shimmer and a couple more goons with a few precise kicks.

Two more goons bent over backwards and bumped their heads together, as Zatanna rose grinning from behind them.

Aquaman washed Mammoth away towards Superboy and then used his water whips to propel himself up to the top of the crater.

‘ _ Psimon is taken care of! _ ’ M’gann’s voice sounded in their heads, and Dick almost screamed with joy. The mind link was back on.

So the speedster had them duped and dropped strategically to have them deal with Savage’s minions.

Not  _ the speedster.  _ Wally!

His heart walloping at miles per minute, Dick jumped Killer Frost and had her pinned down in almost no effort. He didn’t care, didn’t want to waste time on the nuisances.

He had to go see Wally now.

***

‘Hey Vandal, looking for this?’ The speedster waved his arm with the device in it.

‘Why is the kid loose?!’ Slade mumbled under his breath. ‘Wasn’t he supposed to be brain-dead?’

Luthor only smirked, shrugging, and his broadcast went black.

Savage harrumphed and rolled his eyes. He hated working with others.

‘Let’s get out of here,’ he urged.


	10. Sunlight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wally West returns, this time for real.  
> Dick would've thought wild horses couldn't drag him away... But now he can't even make his legs move to go see him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cheesy reunion fluff here we go!

They swarmed to him like moths to the flame, and he sank in each of their hugs.

‘Good to see you, gang,’ he was laughing. He gripped M’gann around the waist and spun her in the air. Kaldur kissed his brow; and Conner could not decide between crushing him in a hug and not actually killing him again; finally, he pulled Artemis into an embrace, and after that neither of them was able to let the other go.

‘I should deck you!’ Artemis would have screamed if her voice wasn’t cracking. ‘What the hell was that?! That was horrifying, what you just did!’

He shrugged sheepishly. ‘Sorry? I know it wasn’t… cool. But I really needed Vandal to let his guard down. What better way than pretending to drop his enemies.’

‘It was quite a plan, old friend,’ Kaldur kept his palm on Wally’s shoulder.

After such a long time of struggling with both doubt and hope, releasing him was not an option; just to make sure this was not another vision.

‘I still can’t believe it,’ M’gann kissed his temple. ‘It worked, you’re back! How?! When we took off that collar, we thought you went berserk…’

Wally shook his head with a hint of exhaustion.

‘My mind only went clear right then. When you removed that chip. Those needles had been  _ a pain _ ,’ he explained cheerfully; M’gann made a tearful snort. ‘When they tried to erase my mind,’ he shuddered at the memory, ‘everything came back instead. I remembered you guys. Before… I’m not sure I can tell you much about before that.’

Artemis squeezed him tighter.

‘We’ve missed you,’ she mumbled.

‘Yeah? Who are you again?’ He tried to joke, but his voice was a little too high-strung. Waning sunlight fell on them over the walls of the crater, all their silhouettes traced with a warm orange aura, and there was silence in the air, but it was  _ full _ .

Kaldur looked over his crowd. ‘Wait, aren’t we missing someone?’ He asked glumly.

There was a short pause.

Wally huffed, looking up from Artemis’s shoulder. ‘ _ That _ moron.’

Artemis raised her face from his chest and looked up at him with a grin. ‘You wouldn’t even believe.’

‘I’m gonna need you to let me go for a few secs.’

‘I’ll live.’

He laughed, squeezed her one more time and then let go. Kaldur nodded at him smirking.

‘It’s best if you go get him. He’s not listening to any of us these days.’

Wally grinned and cracked his knuckles. ‘Now where the hell is he.’

‘What are  _ you  _ doing?’ Zatanna asked. Dick was resting against the side of the Super-Cycle, arms crossed on his chest and the look lost on the empty crater that had just been their battlefield. ‘He’s here already.’

Dick glanced at her.

‘I… I know,’ he replied quietly. She raised an eyebrow. ‘I’ll be right there.’

He had watched from a distance, how the overjoyed team drowned him in affection. He wanted nothing more than to join them, bask in all that  _ life _ , warmth and laughter… 

But his legs had turned to lead, and the weight of his guilt was overwhelming. Before, he was ready to rush to him at any time, and turn the world upside down just to see him… But in the end, did he really have a right to..? He promised, and he  _ did not  _ save him. Wally saved himself, and all of them again.

And nothing was scarier than the thought of meeting him and finding out that Wally did, in fact, blame him for everything, just like he did himself.

He knew he was being stupid. He was. But the voices in his head wouldn’t shut up- 

‘Well?’

Dick almost jumped. His look snapped to the front of the Super-Cycle. Wally was standing there with his one fist on his hip and the other arm around Zatanna’s shoulders, and he had a curious look on his face; he had his goggles down on his neck, and his cowl was off. ‘I’ve been stuck as Darkseid’s prisoner for three years. What’s your excuse?’

Muffled voices got his attention, and Dick noticed Artemis’s hand flashing from behind the Cycle and tugging at Zatanna’s arm; she dragged her out of view. Dick decided to ignore them.

The sun was going down beyond the crater, and soft orange light fell on Wally’s face through the cracks they had made in its walls, while Dick found himself stuck in the Cycle’s shadow.

He could only  _ stare _ .

‘M-my… My excuse for what?’ He whispered.

‘For hiding out here and not coming to see me.’

Dick stared at him again. He swallowed.

‘As excuses go, yours… is pretty decent,’ he tried to smile, but his mouth wasn’t working.

‘Mhm,’ Wally cocked an eyebrow, walking closer.

His eyes were green, Dick realized.  _ Green _ .

He practically  _ glowed _ .

He looked the same, just as Dick remembered him from all those three years back. Not tall, but not petty either, with filled out shoulders, lanky arms and long legs, with chronically dishevelled hair the colour of blood orange and dark freckles all over his pinkish skin… 

He looked the same, only… Dick pursed his lips to keep them from shaking. How many times had he played out this moment in his head? Hoping, dreaming, rehearsing all the things he would say…

But now his hair was all too red, his freckles too many and too bright, his steps too timid and his smile too kind, and Dick felt a cramp in his heart.

‘It’s really you, isn’t it,’ he muttered weakly. Wally snorted.

‘I don’t know, man, you might be on drugs or something.’

Dick huffed and tried to smile again, but couldn’t, really, his fists curled and his eyes started to itch horribly.

‘You’ve been alive all this time, and we didn’t know… We didn’t come for you.’

‘Shut up. Don’t even fucking go there.’

Dick shook his head. ‘I should’ve looked. Believed. I should’ve… Oh Wally, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m…’ he almost coughed the words out, covering his mouth with both palms, and there was an urgency in his voice, and he retracted even further into the shadow. ‘It never… Even back then, with the Reach, I never meant for you to… I’m so, so sorry-’

He glanced at him again, and his eyes widened when he saw Wally was just holding his hand out for him.

He said nothing, only smiled, if somewhat ruefully.

Dick met his eyes again. Could he really take it..?

‘Dick.’

He exhaled and daintily put his hand on Wally’s. He did not get the time to think before Wally gripped his fingers and pulled him into the light, and then wrapped his arms around him.

‘Come here, you hopeless idiot.’

Dick sobbed dryly under his breath, burying his face against his shoulder and clawing into his back. His muscles spasmed, and his lungs seemed to be forgetting what their exact function was.

‘You have nothing to be sorry for,’ Wally tried to reassure him. His grip was tight around Dick’s shoulders, and his skin felt awful hot, has it always been this hot?

Or was it just that Dick had never actually left the Arctic and was frozen there for three fucking years?

He still did not fully believe it.

That they had time, again.

It was a long minute before Wally pulled back, but still kept his hands on Dick’s shoulders.

‘Wow, dude. You’re huge.’

Dick snorted. He hoped he finally managed a smile that did not look like a grimace.

‘I’m serious. Last thing I remember of you is that skinny twig Conner could flick off with one finger.’

‘Hey now. I wasn’t so bad.’

‘No, no… But look at you now, all grown up and tall and pretty,’ Wally said, and there was rue in his eyes, even though he smiled. He then drew his palm over the top of his head, until it bumped into the top of Dick’s forehead.

Dick gaped. He was  _ taller than Wally _ ?!

‘Know what? I’m beginning to think you actually had it planned.’

‘ _ What?! _ ’ Dick mumbled, a little lost.

‘Couldn’t get that extra inch no other way, so you decided to erase the competition.’

Dick almost whined.  _ ‘What are you talking about?!’ _

There was a series of snorts and sniggers from somewhere behind the Super-Cycle.

‘That was cheating and you fucking know it.’ Wally snapped, poking dramatically on his chest.  There was a playful glint in his eyes, and Dick’s brain finally caught up.

He stared up at him. Snorted as a small smile threatened to pull the corners of his lips. He snorted again, shaking his head and running his palm over his mouth. Broke into an uncontrollable giggle as his eyes overbrimmed with water.

He plunged forward and wrapped his arms around Wally’s neck, finally crying out loud and letting his tears fall.

Wally pumped his fists, bubbling with laughter.

‘Did you hear that, all of you eavesdropping assholes!? Still got it, Wall-man’s still got it! I can still make even this droopy-eyed moron smile.’

Dick squeezed him harder, shaking with joy, and pent up sorrow, and a sweet release of it all. Wally embraced him back.

‘I… I’ve missed you so much,’ Dick muttered into his shoulder.

‘Now that’s more like what I want to hear. Hey, how long are all of you pricks gonna pretend you’re not there?’

Artemis emerged from behind the Cycle, ran up and jumped on them, and they let her into the hug. She was quickly followed by M’gann, and Kaldur, Conner and Zatanna, who all surrounded them with their arms.

‘You too, girl, good to see you too,’ Wally spoke out of nowhere, and they followed his look.

The Super-Cycle chirped, making Conner chuckle.

_ ‘Now  _ is everyone accounted for?’ Kaldur asked with a smirk when they finally gathered the will to part.

‘Who else didn’t miss me?’ Wally moaned. Dick nudged his side, still keeping his arm around him.

‘Let’s move out, then,’ their leader urged.

They all clambered to their spots on the Cycle. Wally settled between Dick and Artemis, who immediately wrapped her arms around his waist and curled up against his stomach.

‘Okay, girl, get us home,’ Conner said, and the Super-Cycle rose in the air.

Dick felt a small tug on his sleeve. He glanced down and saw Wally grip a tiny corner of his glove between his fingers.

He looked up, and Wally peeked at him shortly, grinning wide, but his eyes were wet.

‘Home, huh.’ He said, and sounded kind of cheerful, but Dick could see the effort behind it.

Dick huffed, grabbed his hand and laced their fingers together.

‘Moron,’ Artemis muttered.


	11. Epilogue

_I wish this was the happy ending we all so desperately needed. But in real life, heroes don’t just fly into the orange sunset with victory songs on their lips._

_In real life, that’s not_ the end _. Not even_ an end _._

_Especially not when you have three years worth of brainwash, torture and trauma to deal with, and let me tell you, there is no quick and easy way to do that._

_The upcoming months were a horrible blur, at best. Between nightmares, eating disorders, fevers, pains and panic attacks, you can imagine I wasn’t the most pleasant company. I slept for days or didn’t sleep at all. I got on everybody’s nerves. And often wrangled with the thought that maybe it would’ve been best if I hadn’t returned._

_And through it all, you wouldn’t believe how much love I received. I went from place to place, and everywhere I was showered with kind and patient smiles, warm hugs and unconditional care. And when they told me they had missed me, I believed them, because I felt the same._

_Gosh, I couldn’t ever eat enough of M’gann’s cookies._

_Maybe I didn’t have a place in the world yet, but damn me I didn’t feel grateful to have all those people in my life again. Them all, my friends… My family._

_Oh, hey, and I fell in love, too, who would've guessed._

_But that’s a story for another day._


End file.
